Generally, we want to associate with those who praise us. Praise fills us with ego. Someone says we are beautiful, someone says we are auspicious, someone says we are great—it brings happiness. But happiness is very expensive. Because if we assume that we are what we are not, then all doors to becoming will be closed.
And who can become beautiful? We may be on the path to becoming beautiful. This path is not one that leads to a destination. We become more and more beautiful, but no one ever becomes beautiful. We become better and better, but no one ever becomes great. It is a journey.
But the one who praises gives the illusion that we have reached our destination. Beware of the one who praises. Don't trust them; trusting them leads you astray. Although the mind will say, "Accept it." Because greatness is so cheap, beauty and truth are so cheap, which fool would refuse? It's free, it comes without asking, someone comes to praise you on their own—who would deny it?
Have you ever noticed? When someone starts praising you, even if you want to refuse, you can't. But remember, whenever someone praises you, you'll feel a deep sense of guilt. You accepted something you're not. You sought fame cheaply. You sought praise without paying anything, without paying a price.
That's why flattery is so effective in this world; because no one can deny it. Tell the ugliest person, "You're beautiful," they won't be able to. Tell the worst person, "You're a saint," they won't be able to deny it.
But the person who is calling you a saint, who is telling you that you're good, has their own motives. They want something from you. Don't think that this praise is coming for free. It may seem free now, but in a little while you'll understand it wasn't free. You'll have to pay a price for this.
And the external costs are fine, like the person borrowing a few rupees, or aspiring for a position, or requesting a job, or getting you to give false testimony in court—these are all small things. The most terrible price you're paying is that if you believe what he says, you'll be lost forever. Because you've put your trust in wealth you don't possess. Why would you search for it now?
This is like a beggar believing he's an emperor. This is like a sick person believing he's healthy. This is blinding yourself. This is suicide. This is a very costly proposition.
Beware of those who praise. Because praise can never be beneficial, it will only harm you.
Understand a little: praise only feels like praise when it portrays you as you are not. If it only says what you are, then it's no praise at all. It's a statement of fact, but you won't be pleased. Calling someone deaf won't make them happy; the fact is accepted. Tell the deaf person what beautiful eyes they have! Tell the blind person, "What a sight to behold!" Then there will be praise.
Praise is always a lie. You are pleased only if it is a lie. If it is true, what praise is there in praise? If you say to a rose, "You are soft," then what praise is there? Yes, when you say to a thorn, "You are soft," then the thorn is pleased.
You are pleased with praise only when something is said that you always wanted to be there, but it isn't. It is the lie that brings happiness in praise. And that praise increases your ego, pride, and arrogance.
Pride is the sum total of all the lies in your life, the essence of them. You have to assemble thousands of lies to build your ego. Ego is the sum total of all lies, a building, a palace. Collect lies brick by brick, and only then can you build a palace of ego.
And praise is like air inflating a balloon; similarly, praise inflate you. But remember, the more a balloon inflates, the closer it gets to bursting. The more it inflates, the closer death comes. The more you delight in being inflated, the closer you get to the grave, the further you move away from life, the closer you get to death.
Ego is like a balloon. The more it inflates, the weaker it becomes, the more it feels like it will break any moment.
All enlightened people have said, close your ears to praise. It will not be beneficial. Don't close your ears to criticism; it can only bring benefits, no harm.
Why can it be beneficial? Because if the criticizer lies, there's no harm; because who would believe his lies? One doesn't even want to believe the truth of criticism.
If a critic calls a truthful person a liar, the truthful person will smile and walk away. There's no strength in this. It's pointless. There's no reason to think about it for a moment. There's no reason to get angry.
Remember, when you call someone a liar and they get angry, understand that you've touched a sore; you've touched a wound; you've touched some truth. When they remain unaffected, understand that you've lied. Calling a thief a thief makes them uneasy. Why would calling a non-thief a thief make them uneasy? There's no wound within them that you can inflict. Calling a selfless person egoistic doesn't prick them; it only hurts the egoistic person.
So, if someone criticizes you with a lie, it's pointless. If one cannot believe true criticism, then who will believe false criticism? But if the criticism is true, then it is very useful, because it reveals some shortcoming of yours, some dark aspect of yours; it reveals some hidden, suppressed inner feeling of yours. What you had turned your back to yourself, it puts it in front of your eyes. If shortcomings are in front of your eyes, they can be erased. If shortcomings are behind your back, then they grow, flourish, and flourish; they cannot be erased. So the critic cannot do any harm, he can only do good.
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